Yokes on Trevor
by vampia-luva
Summary: What happens when Trevor calls Raven a slut and it's near Valentine's day?Read to find out and yes i know this is late,but don't judge me!Rated T for swears and teen content!
1. The Plan

_(New to site. If anyone hates it, then f*ck you. R&R!) _

Yokes on Trevor

(Raven's POV)

I was riding my bike to the mansion. It was February thirteenth, and it was a Friday. St. Valentine's day was tomorrow and I had the perfect on how me and Alexander could spend it._(A/N: For all of you w/ dirty minds, no it's not that. This thing is only rated T.) _I parked my bike inside the gate with a chain.

"Have to be careful with crooks these days. Especially Trevor," I said quietly to myself. I hurried along the uneven steps, got onto the porch, and knocked on the door. Jameson opened the creaky door.

"Good evening, Ms. Raven," he said with a crooked tooth smile. Something about him made me think.

"You gotta date with Ruby, huh?"

"Guilty. Ah, there she is now."

I looked behind me and saw Ruby. She had on a white V-neck with a white tank underneath, along with a white ruffle skirt that went down an inch past her knees, with a pair of white boots that didn't go past her ankles. "Hey, Rave," she said as she saw me.

"Hey, Rubes. You look awesome."

"You too!" We had a little hug before she went off on her date to see The Hunger Games. "Hopefully I'll see you after the movie," she said as she left.

"Hey, beautiful," I heard Alexander say behind me.

"Hey, handsome," I said as I turned around. He was wearing a black Metal Mullisha tee with a pair of black cargos and punk rock boots. His hair still looked like he just rolled out of his coffin. I was wearing black button-up tee with a loosened blood red tie, a pair of black knee length cargo shorts, mid-calf black and red socks, black ankle high boots (sort of like Ruby's), dangling spider earrings, and sort of tamed hair.

"Why are you just standing there in the cold? C'mon inside where it's warm."

"Thanks." We went upstairs to his attic room. "So you excited for tomorrow?"

"Why?"

"Oh, that's right. I haven't told you my big plan yet."

He sighed. "Okay, what is it?"

I took in a deep breath. "Soyaseetrevorhasbeentea-." Alexander interrupted me.

"Whoa whoa! Slow down. Now, start from the begging and enunciate your words."

"Trevor has been teasing me lately and I want some revenge. So I thought that since tomorrow is Valentine's day, I thought you and me could-" again, he stopped me.

"Raven, please don't drag me into one of your crazy shenanigans."

I thought for a moment, and said, with tears in my eyes just by_ thinking _about, "Last November, he said I was a skank. And, yesterday, he said he saw me kissing Phoenix outside the Crypt and said I-I was a slut." By now, I was just plain crying. He walked up to me, put my face in his hands, and wiped my tears away with his paint stained hands.

"It's okay, it's okay. We'll get revenge on him. Now, what was your plan?"

I smiled and told him my plan. He chuckled at one of my ideas and said that it was the perfect plan for us to get revenge on Trevor. After we finished discussing the plans, we shared a heart-melting, leg-wobbling, passionate kiss.

_(Oooh. I wonder the plan can be. Stay tuned.)_


	2. The Yokes Don't Stop There

_(Here's Chapter 2! Promise this on will be longer than the last one!)_

(Raven's POV)

We proceeded the plan the next day. By the way, I got Trevor's plans by hypnotism. (Who knew that crap actually worked!) He and Alana Wellz (captain of girl's softball team) were heading to the park and have a mature make-out session. _SO_ glad we're ruining it. The plan is divided in to three phases. Phase one: follow the unsuspecting targets. Phase two: dump the items on the targets in this order; glue, condoms, then eggs. Phase three: RUN LIKE HELL AND PRAY THAT HE WONT KILL US!

* * *

><p>We saw Trevor exit his mini-mansion with Alana clinging to him. Alexander and I were wearing black turtle necks, black jeans, combat boots (sound familiar?), and I was wearing my usual black make-up. We were hiding in the bushes beside his threshold. She had sandy blonde hair like Trevor, and wearing a red strapless shirt, a pink mini-skirt, pink nails, white stilettos, and a red clutch purse. Trevor was in his usual soccer uniform for some reason. 'Man he made a bad choice to wear that tonight,' I thought. 'He's going to wash that for <em>weeks<em>!' I snickered a little at the thought.

"Target is on the move," Alexander whispered in my ear behind me, dogging me out of my thoughts.

"Roger."

"I'm Alexander," he teased. I rolled my eyes.

He slid his arms around my waist. When the red camero was out of sight, he busted into flight. As in, he stood up with me still in his arms, bent his knees, and flew straight up. I closed my eyes and screamed until he said into my ear, "Don't be scared little one. Open your eyes and see what can be." I stopped screaming and opened one eye, then both. It was amazing! We (more like he) were flying face down, and the sight was beautiful. The town's lights were like little, glowing, multi-colored stars. I laughed and spread my arms out. As we got lower, we spotted the red sports car with two sandy blonds. We didn't get too close for the risk of being spotted by _anyone. _The blonde couple stopped at the park and got out. We hid in a nearby tree. Alexander picked me up bridal style and jumped through the trees following the couple. They stopped at a clearing and he unpacked a picnic. We hid in a ten-foot tree just over the targets and Alexander finally let me down. I squat down and thought, 'I wonder what they're unpacking.'

As if reading my thoughts, Alexander whispered, "Wine, a cheese platter, salad with dressing, two cheese burgers, a large fries, two bottles of water, and at the bottom of the basket, I'm guessing a condom."

I turned to look at him. "You can see all that?" I asked, astounded.

He tapped his nose. "No, I can't see _that_ far, silly. But when you're a vampire, you can smell all sorts of things," then he leaned into my ear, "like right now, you're on your period." He leaned back with a smirk on his face. I was bushing incredibly!

I quickly shook off the blush and said, "We need to initiate phase two."

"Gotcha. I'll go get the stuff." He jumped through the trees. I looked down and saw that they were already making out.

'Dang it! He better get here soon!'

He came back with a jar of full Gorilla glue, a box containing fifty condoms, and two cartons of eggs.

"Perfect." We were just ten feet over them, and in perfect range. We unscrewed to top of the glass jar of glue, set a button bomb in there (provided by Sebastian), closed the lid, and dropped it about a couple of inches next to the tongue-tied couple. They went over to investigate it, Alexander handed me the remote, I said, "Why, thank you," and pressed the big red button in the middle. One KA-BOOM later, there were two sixteen-year-olds covered in white glue.

"Ugh, Trevor! Did you have something to do with this?" yelled Alana

"N-no. I swear," stuttered a scared Trevor.

"Ready for the condoms?" asked Alexander

"Ready, Freddy."

"Again, it's Alexander," he teased again. We both stood, holding the box with its flaps open. I stared into it, That was a lot of blue plastic squares with bulging circles in the middle. Couple were still in the spot the were when we set off the glue bomb. We dumped the condoms and they all stuck to them.

"TREVOR!"

'Oh crap, she's pissed now,' I thought.

"I swear it's not me!"

"THEN WHO WAS IT?"

"I don't know!"

"Egg-bombing time!" I said, enthusiastically. We each took a carton of eggs, each with a dozen eggs. We opened them, and I said, _(A/N: God this is good!) _"Fire!"

Trevor and Alana looked up and said in unison, "Holy sh*t!" Alexander and I started pelting them with raw eggs.

"I'm going to kick your ass on Monday, Monster girl!" yelled a very pissed off Trevor

"Time to initiate phase three," I said to Alexander. He picked me up again and flew off. When we couldn't here a cursing like a maniac Trevor, I said, "Phew! Glad we got outta that one fast." We laughed for a few minutes.

"Hey, Raven."

"Yeah."

"I have a question that I have to ask."

"Shoot."

He sighed. "Just exactly, what were the condoms for?"

"He called _**me**_ a skank and then a slut, when _**he's**_ the real man whore."

"Tha actually makes perfect sense."

Then I thought of something. "Hey, Alexander?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you know of any good doctors?"

He had a puzzled look on his face. "Why?"

"You know, may need it after school Monday."

"Raven, I'm sure he was just saying that because he was angry."

"Keyword on 'maybe'."

He sighed. "I'll give Dr. Artavio-"(ar-tay-vee-oh) "-a call after I drop you off at your home tonight."

"Thank you, Alexander," and I gave him a thankful kiss on the cheek. He blushed as red as a tomato. Then he dropped me off in my bedroom through the window, since it was 1:AM in the morning, not wanting to wake my parents up.

"See you tomorrow night in the cemetery?" he asked.

"You betcha."

"Perfect," then he leaned in and gave me a passionate kiss.


	3. The Aftermath

_(Woo-hoo! Chapter three!)_

(Raven's POV)

I was walking down the halls of Dullsville High. It was the Monday after Operation: Get Revenge On Trevor For Calling Raven A Skank And Then A Slut With Glue, Condoms, Eggs, And Hair Dye! Or Operation: GROTFCRASATASWGCEAHD! Last night, Alexander told me that after we accomplished half the mission, he called his Doc and that he was coming early morning Monday. So he was already here.

I was wearing my black 'I Hate Mondays' tee shirt with a black mini skirt, ripped black tights, scuffed up combat boots, heavy black make-up, spiked up hair with two skull barrettes, black clunky bracelets, and my bat necklace I got for my sweet sixteen from my BFF, Becky.

I suddenly saw my arch nemeses, Trevor. He was _**still**_ messy from Saturday night. But there was one thing that I just had to laugh at. His failed died black hair! Boy did that bring memories.

_(FLASHBACK)_

It was the night after the first part of the mission. Time to complete part two. Just before Trevor's Nine-O'-Clock shower (got the information from some cheerleader), I snuck into his house, sleuthed my way to the second floor bathroom (again, cheerleader) with a small bottle of black hair dye in my pocket. It was 8:50 PM, ten minutes before the deadline. I found Trevor's shampoo. I was surprised to se what type he uses. I was expecting Axe. 'Oh. My. God. He uses Herbal Essences? No wonder I smell fruit when he sits in front of me' I thought. I grabbed the bottle, unscrewed the top, put the hair dye in the bottle, and ran like hell out of there.

_(FLASHBACK OVER)_

When I saw that his hair was black, I laughed my butt off. Not only was Trevor's hair black, but I had some good black-(like Trevor's hair!)-mail useful for the future.

"What are you laughing at, Monster Girl?"

"Oh, nothing, Fruit Boy. Except for the fact that I have some awesome news for you."

"Two things. One, why did you call me 'Fruit Boy'? And two, what type of news? You're finally falling for me?"

"In order; I know you use Herbal Essences, I made your hair black, and I wouldn't fall for you if you were the last being in the universe!"

"How did you get my hair black? How did you know I use Herbal Essences? And why haven't you've fallen for me yet?

"Again, in order. Last night I snuck into your bathroom, don't ask how I know which ones yours, and I put black hair dye in your shampoo. And about the last question, I have to whisper it." He leaned in and I said, more like yelled, into his ear, "YOU'RE A SOCCER SNOB WHO'S A MAN WHORE AND HAS GOTTEN EVERY GIRL IN SCHOOL EXCEPT FOR ME AND BECKY! ALSO YOU'RE THE BIGGEST, BLONDEST, AND MOST IDIOTIC NEANDERTHAL I HAVE EVER MET!" His ear was literally bleeding when I was done yelling. Luckily, we had ten minutes before first hour started. Plenty of time for Trevor's ear to recover.

"Damn, Monster Girl! You made me deaf in one ear!" He had to practically yell to hear himself.

"Oh, boo hoo." I faked cried. "I'm so sorry. Oh, grow up Trevor! Your ear will be fine by second hour." The bell rang. "Whoa, talk about saved by the bell. Smell you around, Fruit Boy!"

_(Later that night)_

I arrived at the mansion sooner than planned. I was supposed to be there by 8:00 PM, but I finished my homework, and my chores, earlier than expected.

Becky was watching Matt score goals with a black and white, leather stitched ball, no BFF time there. Mom had an un-expected meeting with her doctor, so can't do any mother-daughter bonding there. Dad was out on a business meeting, no Daddy-daughter time there. Billy Boy was at a math club meeting, initiating a new member, (I think it was Jagger's little bro, Valentine or something) so no sibling bonding there. (Not like I wanted to anyways!)

Anyways, I arrived at the mansion at 6:45 PM. I parked my bike on the porch and knocked on the door. It was a minute or so before someone opened the door. It wasn't Jameson who opened the door, it was someone I have never seen before. He was older than me, about mid-twenties, he had wavy blonde hair that went to the middle of his eyes, and wore a normal doctor outfit. I would have assumed him as normal doctor if it weren't for the golden colored eyes and stunning features of his strong chiseled face.

I stopped my staring when he broke the silence. "Oh, you must be Raven. Hi, I'm Dr. Carlisle Cullen. Alexander called my co-worker, Artavio Banks, but he couldn't come, so I'm here." He held out a hand for me to shake.

I shook it and said, "Raven Madison. It's a pleasure to meet you. I am very sorry we caused you trouble for coming here when you have other patients in . . . Where exactly are you hailing from?"

"Forks, Washington. And it's no trouble at all. Things were getting pretty slow at the hospital."

"Ah, Miss Raven, you are an hour and ten minutes early. What brings you here?" Jameson suddenly appeared at the door next to Carlisle.

"Oh, nothing. I was bored since my family's out and Becky's with her beau. Just wanted to know if I'm needed here. You know, helping with dinner, clean, dust, sweep, anything at all. I'm bored out of my mind here!"

"I just remembered! I need to call home and see how my family's doing. We've just had a new member not to long ago and I need to see how Edward and Bella are handling with little Nessie. Excuse me for a moment." Carlisle said and quickly ran up the stairs. _(A/N: spoiler alert for those of you who haven't seen Breaking Dawn Part 1. And those of you who did, Nessie is Jacob's nickname for Bella's baby.)_ I was a little confused because he looked so young, but shook it off.

"Well," Jameson contemplated, "Alexander's room _does_ need cleaning. So . . ."

"Thanks, J!" I said and quickly went up to Alexander's room. Jameson was right. His room _did_ need cleaning. CDs, clothes, and other unnamable items were scattered all over the floor. I sucked it up and started picking the dirty clothes and stuffed them in his already full hamper. After that was done, I picked up the CDs and put the right ones in the correct case and put them in his CD stack near is monster speakers in alphabetical order. Like I said, I was bored out of my mind. When trash was in trash bags and Alexander's items were where they were supposed to be, I started to sweep the floor. When I was almost done, Alexander's closet door creaked and he stepped out wearing a plain black tee with fuzzy black bottoms with pink bats all over them. I giggled when I saw his pants. "Well, well. Looks like your finally up. The sun set fifteen minutes ago, sleepy head." I said with another giggle.

"Raven? You're aren't supposed to be here for another . . ." he looked at his phone for the time, "thirty minutes. What are doing here so early?"

I leaned the broom against the wall and said, "Well let's see, I got my homework and chores done at 6:15, my family was out, and Becky is on a date with Matt and a soccer ball. I cruised my bike over here and got here at 6:45, met Dr. Cullen, Jameson told me your room needed cleaning, and I've been up here ever since. And sorry It's still a little messy, I haven't finished sweeping yet. But on the bright side, it's improved much more since I got to it."

Alexander took around the room. He looked over to the CDs and saw them in alphabetical order. He started laughing.

"What's so funny?"

"Raven, you did this all, because you were bored?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"All I have to say is, you're awesome!"

"Thanks, Alexander! Anyway, remember what I said about Trevor using a certain shampoo?"

"Yeah. Why? Is it true?"

"Let's just say, I have perfect blackmail for the future, if he wants that stupid blond hair back, he has to shave his head bald, and I'm going to call him 'Fruit Boy,' from now on."

"Again, You are awesome! I'm actually glad I have a spy for a girlfriend."

_THE END!_


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